Nothing new just how it is

Betrayal and abuse. 

These are my life.

I created my own karma

I am reaping what I have sown

I have changed my life for the better

I have kept my promise to be kind to others

I have kept my promise to be honest with others

I have kept my promise to not hurt anyone again

I have not let the want of money rule my life

I have shared all I have with those who need it more

All of these I have been happy to do

They have enriched my life, being and sense of self

But the rooster still comes home to roost

I must still pay a much heavier price for my gross misdeeds

I must still suffer the same kinds of emotional and physical pain I visited on others

I must be distrusted and reviled as my past dictates

I must be hurt over and over again,

The emotional beatings should never stop

The people I trust the most will forever betray that trust

I will be used by those closest to me

I will be thrown away like common trash once I have no more to give

They will tell me they love me while desiring to witness my destruction

Betrayal and abuse

These are my life, my jailers

I have created my own karma, set the stage for my own damnation

I will continue to reap the bitter harvest I have sown

This is my future and I am resigned to it

The distance of this marathon seems to great, insurmountable

Because it is supposed to be